Skip to content

Random Hump Day WTFs.

August 22, 2012

Ally: Welcome to Wednesday and FPQT! If you’re new here, this is basically all you need to know.

Have a nice day. Come again.

Listen, I don’t know how to explain Adam Sandler. I’ve had a crush on him forever. I get that he would probably make odd sounds in the bathroom and likely spend most of the day clearing his throat in that gross boy way, but he’d make me laugh and I’d be the pretty one, so…there’s that.

We’re going to meet to review the rules of the Fantasy Pretend Boyfriend League. There’s a lot of questions L-A did not anticipate when she gave birth to this concept. Basically, things may change. Things that fall outside of me trading Eminem ever. Or The Yelawolf, but I don’t reckon anyone really wants him around.

So as you would expect when you come to the site and see it’s me who has started a post and not L-A, I don’t quite have a theme for today’s entry. It’s more of a list of WTFs.

Random Hump Day Wtf #1: This is not ok, UK

I mostly enjoy Michelle Williams. Mostly. Lately she’s been dipping a little bit too much into the Hipster Pot of Gold, but I try to judge quietly. When a subsidiary of Vogue comes out and applauds an outfit that is just plain all kinds of wrong, I feel justified in speaking out.



Really? “Today’s downtime style muse”? With that logic my current outfit of a five-year-old white t-shirt from Garage and my husband’s boxers is downright cover worthy.

(L-A: Mere moments before reading what Ally had to say on this, I was reading about it on Go Fug Yourself. They are on the same page as Ally). 

Random Hump Day Wtf #2: Wtf is a “Monroe Piercing”?

Someone on Twitter this week mentioned they were “getting a Monroe”. I took to Google.



Do any of you have one? I need to see it in real life.

 Random Hump Day Wtf #3: How can you even front on Scarlett? 

Do you remember when the “media” got some poor photos of Scarlett wearing a bikini on the beach? I’m not even going to link to them, that’s how ridiculous they were. The cameras discovered…are you ready for this? CELLULITE.

Unfortunately I cannot relate to cellulite as I am completely flawless, I’m sure you all are as well. Rant about our stupid and unobtainable body aspirations aside, Scarlett Johansson is one of the most beautiful women around. This is not debatable.

Here’s her casual wear out in Paris the other evening. Please take note Vogue UK.


Haters can suck it.

Random Hump Day WTF #4: When Lady Gaga has to pull a Miley Cyrus

Friends, we’ve reached a new low of narcissism. It’s one thing when I take to Twitter to post adorable selfies of me doing the “Ally is not Impressed” face.

Here I am being not impressed about what the humidity is doing to my hair! OMGs I’m adorable!

I am not Lady Gaga, however. I need to be ridiculous on Twitter to get all kinds of attention (actually, no one @replied me on this one which means my followers obviously want the selfies to keep coming). Lady Gaga does not need to take PR advice from Miley Cyrus and get her fans to emit tweet orgasms over the thought of her dying her hair brown.


At least you know it’s boring, Gaga. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? Remember this?

(Kid Friendly version!)

 Post-Publish  Urgent Update: Avril Lavigne is set to marry the ringleader of Nickleback. This is amazing, amazing news.

6 Comments leave one →
  1. August 22, 2012 9:31 am

    Three things:
    1) I’m old. A Monroe piercing looks like it could wreak hell on your teeth/jaw/mouth area.

    2) Lady Gaga now has Stan Sitwell eyebrows and that is amazing to me.

    3) Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger make perfect sense. But not, you know, in a good way. Like if me and Jon Hamm could just get this thing figured out, romantic comedy-styles.

    • August 22, 2012 9:55 am

      Hey! Step away from my pretend boyfriend Krista!

    • allygarbs permalink
      August 22, 2012 10:42 am

      1)I don’t like the monroe either
      2)All of Lady Gaga’s actions are amazing to me now.
      3)I can’t believe we didn’t come up with this match-up before. I’m disappointed in us. All of us.

  2. August 22, 2012 9:44 am

    I got all kinds of excited when I saw one of my pretend boyfriends (Jason Segel) on today’s post. I figured I was a shoe in for some bonus points for that. Then I saw why, and now I’m slowly backing away so as not to lose points.

    • allygarbs permalink
      August 22, 2012 10:42 am

      That is HILARIOUS. I don’t think it was his fault.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: